Oh! I don't want to seem like a pain
But this thought has got lodged in my brain.
Can I be slightly shifty?
I don't WANT to be fifty!
Can I reset to 40 again?
They say that Life Begins at forty.
You're tall, healthy, sexy and sporty.
At 50? There's gout
Baldness, hair falling out
And you're not up to anything naughty.
I don't have a problem with age
But being young seems all the rage
When you reach 49
You cross some sort of line
And get put in the *Old Ruin* cage
And at times I have to agree
I'm no longer as fit as a flea
All my bits used to function!
Now I'm slathered in unction
With rheumatics in elbow and knee
But then look at the youth of today.
They think violence is some sort of play
And stealing is fun
As is owning a gun
And stabbing folk who get in their way.
And...I'm not really such an old fart
I've experience and facts to impart.
No, sod it, okay
That's fine. 50 I'll stay.
(Can I just have a body restart?)